Zen For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously

1. SAVE THE WHALES. COLLECT THE WHOLE SET.

2. A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE, NIGHT.

3. ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU HAVE DIFFERENT FINGERS.

4. I JUST GOT LOST IN THOUGHT. IT WASN'T FAMILIAR TERRITORY.

5. 42.7 PERCENT OF ALL STATISTICS ARE MADE UP ON THE SPOT.

6. 99 PERCENT OF LAWYERS GIVE THE REST A BAD NAME.

7. I FEEL LIKE I'M DIAGONALLY PARKED IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE.

8. HONK IF YOU LOVE PEACE AND QUIET.

9. REMEMBER, HALF THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW ARE BELOW AVERAGE.

10. HE WHO LAUGHS LAST, THINKS SLOWEST.

11. DEPRESSION IS MERELY ANGER WITHOUT ENTHUSIASM.

12. THE EARLY BIRD MAY GET THE WORM, BUT THE SECOND MOUSE GETS THE CHEESE.

13. I DRIVE WAY TOO FAST TO WORRY ABOUT CHOLESTEROL.

14. SUPPORT BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

15. MONDAY IS AN AWFUL WAY TO SPEND 1/7 OF YOUR WEEK.

16. A CLEAR CONSCIENCE IS USUALLY THE SIGN OF A BAD MEMORY.

17. CHANGE IS INEVITABLE, EXCEPT FROM VENDING MACHINES.

18. GET A NEW CAR FOR YOUR SPOUSE. IT'LL BE A GREAT TRADE!

19. PLAN TO BE SPONTANEOUS TOMORROW.

20. ALWAYS TRY TO BE MODEST, AND BE PROUD OF IT!

21. IF YOU THINK NOBODY CARES, TRY MISSING A COUPLE OF PAYMENTS.

22. HOW MANY OF YOU BELIEVE IN PSYCHO-KINESIS? RAISE MY HAND.

23. OK, SO WHAT'S THE SPEED OF DARK?

24. HOW DO YOU TELL WHEN YOU'RE OUT OF INVISIBLE INK?

25. IF EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE GOING WELL, YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY OVERLOOKED SOMETHING.

26. WHEN EVERYTHING IS COMING YOUR WAY, YOU'RE IN THE WRONG LANE.

27. HARD WORK PAYS OFF IN THE FUTURE. LAZINESS PAYS OFF NOW.

28. EVERYONE HAS A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY. SOME JUST DO NOT HAVE FILM.

29. IF BARBIE IS SO POPULAR, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BUY HER FRIENDS?

30. HOW MUCH DEEPER WOULD THE OCEAN BE WITHOUT SPONGES?

31. EAGLES MAY SOAR, BUT WEASELS DO NOT GET SUCKED INTO JET ENGINES.

32. WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU GET SCARED HALF TO DEATH TWICE?

33. I USED TO HAVE AN OPEN MIND BUT MY BRAINS KEPT FALLING OUT.

34. I COULDN'T REPAIR YOUR BRAKES, SO I MADE YOUR HORN LOUDER.

35. WHY DO PSYCHICS HAVE TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR NAME?

36. INSIDE EVERY OLDER PERSON IS A YOUNGER PERSON WONDERING WHAT HAPPENED.

37. JUST REMEMBER - IF THE WORLD DID NOT SUCK, WE WOULD ALL FALL OFF.

38. LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND, WHICH IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT UNTIL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK

The Guacamole Song (with Recipe)

I love this song! I'm not a real big fan of guacamole dip though. On occasion I will eat it. I think the inclusion of the kids in the song was cute.

Further insight into the recent plane bird-downing

IN CASE YOU DIDN'T FIGURE IT OUT BY NOW...............

What brought down the plane in the Hudson River?

This Holiday Don't Get sent to the Dog House

Beware Of The Dog House


Posted using Share This

This is a video click on the picture or the link "Beware Of The Dog House" above to see this video.

Wal*Mart Bingo

I stopped by the office of a good friend and he had this Bingo card hanging on the outside of his door and I said I've got have a copy of that....

This is a game the whole family can enjoy or be repulsed by on their next visit to Wal*Mart.

Can you spell Eucalyptus? 911 call

That Pumba was being a rascal.

Mission Call - Josh Harris

Our good friends Natalie and Don 2nd oldest son got his mission call yesterday. We were called to participate in this wonderful event last night. We got over to the Harris Haven just before 9pm and witnessed Josh opening his letter to server in the Kenya, Nairobi Mission. It was exciting speculating where Josh might go. I thought he would go Spanish speaking like his father. I was way off. To watch a video of Josh opening his letter, go to his older sister Megan's blog here. To read about his mom's feeling go here. I've never been to the African Continent, perhaps my brother-in-law Rob who's been everywhere can comment and tell us about Kenya. His mission includes Tanzania, Mt. Killimanjaro, probably Lake Victoria too. Here's a link to the Kenya Nairobi mission.

I thought I'd include an humorous email that I received about LDS missionaries with this entry:

Resourceful

Two LDS missionaries were visiting homebound patients when they ran out
of gas. As luck would have it, a gas station was just a block away.

The two walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The
attendant said that the only gas can he owned had been lent out, but
they could wait until it was returned.

Since young men were on the way to see a patient, they decided not to
wait and walked back to the car. They looked for something in the car
that could be filled with gas and spotted the bedpan they were taking to
the patient.

Always resourceful, they carried the bedpan to the station, filled it
with gas, and carried the full bedpan back to the car.

While the missionaries were pouring the gas into the tank, two men
watched from across the street. One of the them turned to the other and
said, "If it starts, I'm turning Mormon."

What kind of Geek are You?

Behold, I stand at the door and knock

The bishop with one of his counselor's was visiting the homes of his ward members. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.

Therefore, he took out a tithing envelope and wrote “Revelation 3:20″ on the back of it and stuck it in the door.

When the tithes and offerings were processed the following Sunday, his financial clerk found a tithing envelope, marked, for the bishop's eyes only. The bishop found that his tithing envelope had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, “Genesis 3:10.”

Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke out in laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.” Genesis 3:10 reads, “I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.”

“A cheerful heart is good medicine” (Prov. 17:22)